mikah the composer

A recent blog by one of my college friends brought back a memory that makes me smile.

When I was in 2nd grade, Andrea and I were going to start a band. It was going to be called "BFF: Best Friends Forever." I remember parts of our first song. "The grass is green, the sky is blue. You like me, and I like you." So simple! Is that really how simple life was back then? Or were we just trying to put together any words that rhyme? I'm guessing a little of both. :)

The rest of the lyrics were various phrases like..."the dolphins swim", "the birds fly", and my personal favorite: "the ladybugs crawl." I don't really remember the rest: maybe she does? But we would dance around on the Chamberlin school playground coming up with this "song." The song had a tune that wasn't very melodic and changed almost every day, but still, we just knew it was going to make us famous.

In a way, I'm still this idealistic and naive. I still have this [sometimes ridiculous] hope for all these many projects I start. I still think that someday in the future something miraculously wonderful is going to happen to me. The difference is that now things get so complicated. When I focus on the future I see a lot of obstacles and hoops to jump through. Sometimes it all gets so complicated that I just want to go back to skipping around on the playground singing nonsensical rhymes.

inspiration

Thanks to Nina and Grace, I am once again motivated!

Here's the deal. Nina and I have the same days off of work. We are going to start going to dance classes next week. 4 a week (2 jazz, 1 tap, 1 musical theatre). We are also going to go jogging in Central Park at least once a week, as weather permits. We are also going to start volunteering with New York Cares. We have our first orientation set up for Thursday. All of this is in my planner so it's official and I can't back out. I am going to be a wonderful busy person.

That's all.

ooh, reality tv

I went to my first audition recently. It was for MTV's reality TV show "Find the Next Elle Woods!" I straightened my hair and then curled it into big soft curls, and then wore this pink and black kinda leopard print wrap dress thing. I looked so damn cute. I showed up 3 hours before the call is supposed to start, and there was already this line of about 80 little sorority girls in front of me. Then...it started snowing. It snowed hard. And didn't let up for a single minute of those 3 hours I waited. It was actually kind of funny in a not so funny way. When we finally got in, we had to wait longer. I finally get in the actual audition room. There were about 15 people in the audience. Kate Shindle, the dance captain for Legally Blonde, Bernie Telsey, the writers, the director, MTV folk, the list goes on and on. Everyone was really really nice. I got on stage and proceeded to embarrass myself beyond belief. The accompanist screwed up my song to where it was unrecognizable. I think she was even switching time signatures; I don't know what the hell she was doing. My voice wasn't it's best because I was out in the snow for 3 hours. And these factors shook me to where I mixed up the words. It was the worst audition I've ever given in my entire life. And in front of all these important people. I wanted to die.

Oh, and I forgot. Right after my audition I had to rush over to 51st and Broadway, throw on a poodle skirt, and sing and wait tables until midnight. What a fantastic way to end the day!

my new friends are talented.

Holy crap...can you believe I work with these people?
Check out some of their music if you have a few minutes...it's beautiful.

Ben
my favorite song: Fall in Line

Sarah
my favorite song: Not Now

They make me want to write my own music.

all or nothing

So sometimes I'm incredibly inspired and sometimes I'm so lazy and I just sit on my butt all day. I hate when I do that. It's always all or nothing with me. With everything. I get so excited about things, and start so many projects, but then never finish them. I can't follow through. It's like I use all my energy up on being excited at the start and then I have nothing left. Frustrating.

I have so many big ideas about this new year, so many things I want to accomplish. The problem is that they all seem to be linked together. It seems to me like I can't do one without the other. Like, I want to start going on auditions, but to do that I feel like I need to get in shape, start taking classes, go to the dermatologist, and get new headshots. Okay.. But I can't get new headshots without going to the dermatologist, getting my hair done, and getting in shape first! And I shouldn't really go the gym until I completely get rid of this sick thing I have that doesn't seem to be going away. And I don't want to start taking classes until I'm well, my skin is better, and I'm in shape. And on top of all that, everything I need to do costs a ton of money and I need to space it all out to save. It's like a never ending puzzle. I can't figure out what I need to start with, so I'm sitting in limbo, waiting for something to happen to me. Why can't I just suck it up and jump in?

Probably the gym would be a good starting point. But...yuck.
I should use my "all or nothingness" on the gym. Maybe I could get myself addicted to exercise. Now THAT would be a good phase to go through.

new years day

New Years Day was one of my best days in New York so far. I went to Central Park for the first time by myself. Everything about it was beautiful. The weather was even beautiful and that's really rare lately. I'm sorry I'm always going on and on about how beautiful everything in life is, but I can't help it! There are lots of ugly things too, but why go on and on about them? Where's the fun in that?

I didn't have my camera with me, so pictures from my sprint phone will have to suffice. It doesn't really capture the feeling of the day, but I tried.

personality

I've been thinking about this lately. Why do I like to blog? I said I started so I could keep in touch with friends, but that hasn't really been the case. Blogging is actually kind of useless. So why continue? I have a couple of theories.

One reason I blog: I like to write.

Another reason I blog: To help keep my mind in order. I am, by nature, a mess. Scatterbrained, unorganized, whatever you want to call it. Writing down my thoughts helps me put everything together.

And the main reason I blog: I adore talking about myself! I used to feel very guilty about this, but now I just revel in it. I can't help that I find myself fascinating. But I also find all other people fascinating. I love learning about what makes people tick.

And on that note...I want to talk about the Meyers-Briggs personality test! I love it. It's like reading your horoscope profile, but actually based in some kind of reality.

I am an ENFP. Extroverted iNtuitive Feeling Perceiving. I think. I've taken a million of these tests, and they all come out saying that, but it's always a close race between introvert and extrovert. The ENFP is a "Champion Idealist." It's almost scary how well it describes me. Short attention span, no eye for detail, restless, and check this out: "ENFPs almost always have a strong need to be liked. Sometimes, especially at a younger age, an ENFP will tend to be "gushy" and insincere, and generally "overdo" in an effort to win acceptance. However, once an ENFP has learned to balance their need to be true to themselves with their need for acceptance, they excel at bringing out the best in others, and are typically well-liked." I really think that hits the nail right on the head. Here's a short but sweet summary. What do you guys think? I know that some of it describes what how I want to be seen and not how I really am, but some of it really does fit me perfectly.

If you don't know your type and want to take the test, here's a decent one. And here's another. Let me know what you are! It might explain why we get along so well. Or why we clash. :) Fun, right?

currently reading: don't know much about history by kenneth c. davis
currently listening to: les demoiselles de rochefort soundtrack